Author: My First Name Abortion Date: March 1992
Jeff (husband): It was about five months into our six month engagement when we found out we were pregnant. We didn’t want to embarrass our families at the wedding. When you’re 20-something years old, you believe the lie that it’s not a baby yet. But deep down you know there is a life at stake.
We didn’t talk about the abortion for 15 years, and the first years of marriage were extremely difficult. I came to a crossroad where I could either run to the Lord or continue down the path of destruction I was on. We masked the abortion in worldly ways first, and then we ran to the church and we masked it there too. Neither of us had ever dealt with the hurts and wounds, or the guilt and shame that comes along with ending the life of your first child. We served the church and helped others, but we never dealt with the abortion until we finally turned it over to the Lord and began sharing our testimony.
A woman deserves to be protected and fought for, and abortion is everything but that. Instead, the man is saying, “I don’t value you. I don’t value our child,” which is the complete opposite of how God created us to be. As men we are created to protect our family, but when it comes to abortion we are too often weak and passive. I certainly was, and I have regretted my decision for over 20 years. It is something I will never forget. I have been forgiven, but the pain and regret remains.
Tricia (wife): I wanted the man I was about to marry to rescue me and tell me it was going to be alright. I wanted him to choose our child over being embarrassed at the wedding. It seems ridiculous now. How could we have been so selfish? It has taken me years to forgive myself, though I know the Lord has forgiven me. Accepting forgiveness is like receiving salvation. You do it by faith. Does it take the hurt away? No. It’s a process, and it’s about allowing God to meet you where you are.