My precious child. I have thought about you every day of my life for the past 26 years. I have lived with the guilt and shame and just refused to be forgiven. If I could just find a way to travel back in time. If I could have just talked to someone about my options. If I could just go backwards and start again. I miss you. I know now that some day Jesus will put you in my arms. For now, you are with my Granny and Granddad. What a wonderful place to be. I love you more than words. Forever in my heart baby.
Feb 04, 2015 @ 13:16:18
Dear, dear Vicki,
We cannot take back our wrongs. We cannot live the moments over. But once we know they were wrong, we must see the lesson there for us and lay the hefty guilt at Jesus’ pierced feet. He gave his life so that we would be free from sin and guilt of every kind. Yes, He can and He wants deeply to take this horrible weight from you. He wants you to have happiness in His love. Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection only cover you if you let them. Open your hand and let him take the sadness from you. Use the life you have to help others not walk down the same road. Keep them from having to know the awefulness you know. He always gives us opportunities to do right. You can save others from your pain!
God bless you, sweet Vicki! Accept that loving forgiveness! He loves you so!
Feb 04, 2015 @ 13:50:26
Thank you so much Kristen. I found a wonderful church family and I publicly confessed to our women’s group. Here I am almost a year later…walking with my head held high and my shoulders back. I have also been in therapy. Next week I am going to visit with the volunteer coordinator for our local pregnancy crisis center through our church. I believe that God will turn my mess into a message for others. Thanks again for your kind words.
Feb 17, 2015 @ 19:50:13
I too have deep wounds in my heart. This picture is exactly how it feels.
I not only lost two little ones through abortion, but it ruined my entire life. I could not raise my living children because of my addiction to meth and alcohol. But, praise be to the living God, I have been clean for 8 years in April and my family including my children have forgiven me.
Even with all of those blessings it has not been easy.
I went through a post abortion class about six years ago and felt set free. One month ago I started working at a PCP and all these emotions are coming back. Feelings so raw. I am now learning to forgive myself and those involved. It is a long, hard road, but I truly want to be free. My suggestion, if you start volunteering or working for your local PCP, guard yourself with lots of prayer and get grounded in the Word. Put on the full Armor of God to protect yourself from the enemy of your soul. Remember who you are in Christ.
I will be praying for you. Yes, He will use what you have gone through.
Much love to you my dear sister.