Author: My First Name Birth Date: June 1993 Abortion Date: 20 November 1992
I am so sorry. At the time I was 24 and felt that my life was over. The song by the Specials Too Much Too Young was too familiar. I was surrounded at home by many kids and had seen Too Much Too Young in reality. I knew I didn’t want any of that for me. I assumed (wrongly) that what was inside me was a clump of cells that did not resemble a baby. I had a scan but no one showed or even asked me to look nor listen to a heartbeat. I didn’t even think a heartbeat existed in cells. I felt relieved at first and slowly over the years the guilt comes over me in waves. The night before I remember saying to you I am sorry. Years have now gone by and I think of you often. I torment myself with images of scans of what you must have looked like and how many weeks pregnant I was. (Almost 9). I regret not giving you life. You not having a life. I sometimes think I see you in people on the tv and think about what you would be doing now. A fabulous life with all the best qualities of your dad and me and the uniqueness of you. You would see the world and enjoy your life that I took away. No being selfish like I was and never having to regret anything your life would have been amazing. I wish I had been brave. I wish I had seen you, heard you and been strong enough to change my mind. I hope you can try to forgive me for taking away your life 28 years ago. No internet then no excuse though. I am so sorry. I love you x
Dec 09, 2020 @ 23:10:22
Do you know Jesus? He can heal. He will forgive.